Heart so huge, I wonder if they’ll ever know. I hurt, I weep, but maybe it doesn’t show. I worry, I cry, stress then panic. Why is it that my life’s become so manic? Behavior is erratic, don’t know how to take it, predictably an addict. Just rehab for a bit, then go out and fake it. You’re good at it, well not anymore. What is that voice I try to ignore? Thoughts are sporadic, impulsive, to the point. Not meant to hurt, but just to annoint. Life’s so complicated and I’ve raised the stakes high. I want to give it another shot, but I’m afraid of getting denied. You gotta take a chance, give it guts and glory, so by the time you’re where you want to be you can tell your story.
Here’s something about myself that I’ve known for a very long time – I’m impulsively impatient.
By impulsively impatient, I mean that when I’m feeling impatient I say and do things that I wouldn’t normally say or do. And I always end up regretting what I’ve done.
I’m not sure if it’s the New Yorker in me or if I was just born this way but I have to admit, it’s not a quality that I’m necessarily proud of.
Being impatient keeps me on edge.
I find it hard to relax and just go with the flow even when I’m doing the most mundane, everyday things.
Being impatient makes me feel out of control and that’s why I’ve decided to start working on it.
Now, I’m well aware (as you probably are) that implementing news habits can be a pain in the back end.
It’s not easy and there is plenty of room on the road to change for relapse and set backs.
The good news is that developing new habits is challenging for every human being to one degree or another. It doesn’t matter if you are looking to break through your codependent tendencies, quit smoking or are fresh in your recovery. We are all in the same rickety boat.
I’d love to hear all about the tools and techniques you use to keep your recovery going strong. You can share your tips over on the blog. And if there’s something specific that you are struggling with in your recovery, you can leave that over on the blog to.
If you feel inspired to, please share today’s post with a family member or friend that’s on the road to recovery (from anything)!
Here’s to being more patient – wish me luck:)
Until Next Tuesday,
Recovering from an addiction is a process that does not end when you leave the rehabilitation center. It involves developing and implementing new habits that will make you a stronger person and change the way you live your life.
Though this is much easier said than done, there are some habits you can implement to slowly ease your way into recovery.
Below are 7 healthy habits for you to consider. Just remember to pick one or two to work on at a time so that you don’t get overwhelmed.
Cook for Yourself
Proper nutrition has not been a high priority and your body has been neglected in connection with your addiction. Cooking at home is a great way to address proper nutritional needs. In addition to assisting with healthy eating, it also offers a great opportunity to have some positive social time with family and friends at home and rebuild self sufficiency while also repairing relationships. Learning to cook new meals is also a great way to explore new things and to master new skills.
Addiction affects both the physical and mental health of the body. Running also contains physical and mental elements, but rather than destroying your body, it makes it stronger, as stated here. As you learn how to take care of your body again, add in a little running to work on two parts of your health at once. The endorphins don’t suck either!
Have Daily Quiet Time
Just as it is important to take care of your body physically and mentally, recovery can be made better as you address your spiritual side as well. Take time to focus on your spirituality however that may apply to you. Pray, meditate, do yoga, practice deep breathing exercises, or read inspirational quotes or books. You will find you are able to better able to deal with your emotions, difficult situations, and the growing pains of recovery as you make quiet time a priority.
Looking outside of ourselves and finding ways to serve others is a great way to find success in recovery. There are opportunities within the addiction recovery community such as with 12-step programs to help those going through similar struggles. Volunteering will help to boost your self-esteem, as well as expand your social group, which often needs an adjustment as you strive to form healthier relationships.
Part of building new habits is letting go of old ones. In the case of addiction recovery, this means learning to let go of people, environments, and situations that are toxic to you and your recovery. Any of these things can be triggers for a relapse and set you back in the progress you have made. Learn to identify those things that will be potentially harmful and let them become a part of your past. Know your limits and do not try to push them.
Write a Gratitude Journal
Take some time each day to write down a few things for which you are grateful. Some days it might be one thing and other days may lead to a whole page. There are bound to be setbacks in addiction recovery, so having a great list you wrote yourself of the good in your life can do a lot to lighten the burden.
Make a Daily To-Do List
It can be easy to become overwhelmed when you are working to ease yourself back into daily routines. In order to avoid this, make a to-do list each day, with the highest priority items at the top of the list.
Then as the day goes on, cross each completed item off the list. Be realistic when creating the to-do items and do not make the list too long.
As your recovery continues and you become used to your daily routine, you can add additional or more challenging items as you are able to manage them.
Recovery from an addiction is an on-going process and through small, gradual steps you will find yourself healing physically, emotionally, and spiritually.
Over time you will be able to focus on the positive and possibly even help others in their journey to recovery.
I should be use to this by now. She’s gone once again. I’ve become so immune to the lies and disappointments, Once again, addiction has taken the lead. You know this all too well. I know this all too well. I tell myself it’ll be the last time you get to me. I do hope you’re okay though. It’s time for me to take care of myself now. You’ll always be my Mother, don’t worry. Please remember it’s not too late to help yourself. You did it once before. Have you given up? I hope not. Still, I regret not trying hard enough. I was always here. Adult Children of Alcoholics blame themselves over and over again. I’m one of those children. I’ll always be an adult child of an alcoholic, always. I’ve come to the realization that I have options for myself. I can continue to revolve my life around the addiction and alcoholism, but I won’t. I also have the choice to forgive and make peace with my past. It’s what I need to move forward with my life. It’s time to respect myself. No guilt added.